In a world full of butt implants, Instagram filters and Flat Tummy Tea, how does a regular-degular girl from the Chi stay confident?
I have tons of post-its around my house to affirm myself, I embrace my makeup free days and random DMs from men old enough to be my Dad are always an ego-booster. But there’s something else that keeps me feeling good…
Music.
And not just any music, but music from women I like to call the Confidence Queens.
Moments when I’m not feeling the cutest, preparing for an important meeting or when my (imaginary) man got me fucked up, I can turn on some Queen Bey, Nicki, Rihanna and a few other ladies who will remind me who tf I am! And to always remain confident.
I am woman, hear me roar! Or hear me yell “to the left, to the left,” mixed with a little “youuuu ne-e-e-e-e-e-ed me,” and can’t forget about me pulling out my pink Lamborghini just so I can race with Chyna.
And I know I’m not the only one! As women we have sooooo much to worry about, everything from embracing our bodies, to getting the respect we deserve, to not getting harassed when we go to the gas station. It can be a lot. There’s so much on our shoulders and I’m sure at times we could all go for a little boost from a fellow sis.
With the help of these Confidence Queens, I’m able to get that boost by just popping in some headphones and tuning the world out. There’s a song for every mood! And you’ll find yourself screaming lyrics (aka affirmations) like:
I’m the prize!
I’m bout that action!
And yeah I’m in my bag but I’m in his too (aka I’m a BOSS)
So follow along and get those music apps ready to download these new bangers, oldies but goodies and classic hits! All which will help you in feeling more confident.
Affirmation #1: I’m the prize!
Cause you are, sis! We are women! We carry babies in our wombs and run households. We are the masterminds of the family and the brains behind the operation. So we can stunt if we want to. We’ve earned it! My favorite songs to remind me that I’m the prize? (A thread)
Of course we gotta start with the Queen, (all hail Queen Bey) and her banger that had us all taking selfies tagged #IWokeUpLikeThis aka Flawless. Queen Bey has a magical way of reminding you just how special you are. Not only does she have songs like Flawless, but there are other timeless hits like Freakum Dress and Feeling Myself where she collab’d with other Confidence Queen, Onika Maraj (Nicki) Bey NEVER disappoints and I can always count on her for a hit.
Other “I’m the Prize” songs include: Hard by Rihanna *sings* That Rihanna reign just won’t let up! (hashtag true). We got Nicki’s Barbie Dreams, where she’s reminding us how our favorite rappers would love to eat the cake but she’s simply not interested (how you want the puthy can’t say ya S’s and shit, huh?) And an oldie but goodie from Mya where she had to remind her dude like aye, MY love is like woah! Not the other way around. Don’t get it twisted. (Sidenote can you believe that song is 16 years old? Wild).
Then we have new faves like Megan Thee Stallion’s Cash Sh*t.
Come on, all together now *clears throat* YEAH IM IN MY BAG BUT IM IN HIS TOO! THATS WHY EVERY TIME YOU SEE ME I GOT SOME NEW SHOES.
And the list goes on and on. In conclusion, you’re the prize sis! And with the help of these Confidence Queens, you’ll never be able to forget it.
Affirmation #2: I’m bout that action!
And no, I’m not talking about knuckin and buckin on a fellow sister. I’m here for positivity, we should be uplifting one another not tearing each other down. You feels me?
But when it comes to these men? Do you sis! Cause I get it. Sometimes you gotta show AND tell a mf like AYE, THIS AIN’T THAT. And these songs will def get you hyped!
First up, Jazmine Sullivan’s Bust Your Windows. I know, I know, so much for keeping the peace. But my thing is this. Sir, what did you do to Ms. Sullivan that she wanted to bust the windows out your car? So you telling me she just randomly decided to get on that with you? Why is you lying?
Speaking of messing up cars, we cannot forget my Southern Belle sis Carrie Underwood and her hit Before He Cheats. Woo! Miss American Idol did not come to play! She said “I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive.” Sis say I gives no fuck! Ima tell you EXACTLY what I did. Who gon check me, boo?
Other faves include Ciara’s Like a Boy *sings* I’m messing with your head again, dose of your own medicine* Beyonce’s Don’t Hurt Yourself (you ain’t married to no average BITCH boy) and Cardi B’s Be Careful With Me! All these and more, exhibit the “AYE! You got one more time then I’m onnat with yo ass” vibes. Which I like. You’re giving them a second chance but still letting them know I have no problem checking yo ass. #PERIOD
Speaking of #Period, the next affirmation is one where you can scream that word right after:
I’m a Boss, PERIOD.
And it’s true! We women are bosses. We make the world go round. Like Beyonce said in Run the World, “we’re strong enough to bare the children, then get back to business.” These men ain’t never even had period cramps so I don’t wanna hear nothing about them running shit! (I’m mad?)
Other songs to help remind you you’re a boss? I have several:
Ciara’s Level Up! After all her baby daddy drama with Future and upgrading to Papa Russ, Level Up is a hit you can’t help but to nod your head to and be happy that CiCi found her Prince Charming.
Wanting to feel a little more bossy? Well turn on Bossy by Kelis. This oldie but goodie came out in 2006 and I still find myself screaming out “that’s right I brought all the boys to the yard and that’s right I’m the one that’s tattooed on his arm!” No one’s got me tatted on their arm, but if I wanted them to I could! Cause I’m a boss.
Then we got faves like Diva by Beyonce and Independent Women by Destiny’s Child (question). Can’t forget Formation of course and 6 Inch is my all-time fave! I actually listen to this song right before I go into an interview or an important meeting. It reminds me like, hey I do grind from Monday through Friday, work from Friday to Sunday! Thank you, Bey! And I get that last boost of confidence needed before I walk in.
In conclusion, music is a language and these Confidence Queens speak it very well. So next time you are in a mood, turn on one of my homegirls and remember who you are! These Queens wouldn’t have it any other way.
What songs make you feel more confident? Put me on so I can add them! Drop it in the comments below.
Want to jam along to my Confidence Queens playlist? Follow me on Apple Music or Pandora @Jalyssa_DoubleU and hear songs like the above and more.