After watching When They See Us on Netflix, I would be remiss if I didn’t say it… it must be so hard being a black man.
The black man goes through so much. The system is against him from the start. Other races, both men and women are against him. He has to work two times as hard as the white man. He is racially profiled. He is belittled. He is provoked.
But after watching When They See Us, I’ve realized, it’s not just hard being a black man, it’s hard being a black boy too.
Let me explain. (Spoiler Alert).
When They See Us is a film that depicts the true story of the Central Park Five. Now, they may have this title, but their individual names are even more important. Because they are individual people.
You have Antron, Raymond, Yuseff, Kevin and Korey (the only sixteen year old of the bunch). Five young, brown and black men, wrongfully accused of assault, robbery, rape, riot, sexual abuse and attempted murder.
Let me start by saying this: they are innocent. They were innocent when they were accused in 1989 and they are innocent today in 2019.
The story is wild and I am still in shock by the short docu-series. I was emotional the whole time watching it, but it’s been heavy on my heart and I just need to talk about it. As a black woman, who will one day be a black Mom, I just had to say my piece.
But, more on the story…
On April 19, 1989 a woman is attacked in Central Park, New York. She is beaten, bruised and raped. The victim survives, but is severely affected; not only physically but mentally and spiritually as well. She has trouble walking, her sense of smell is gone and her memory is lost.
Now on that same night, Antron, Raymond, Yuseff, Kevin, Korey and 20+ other teenagers between the ages of 14-16 were in Central Park too.
Now, Central Park is huge. It is 840 acres long and extends between 59th and 110th streets and between Fifth and Eighth avenues. But the numbers don’t matter. What matters is that Central Park is so big that it can have two totally different events going on at the same time and not be connected.
But before I give too many details away, let me finish setting up the scene.
So you have the 5 boys, only 2 who actually know each other, having a good time running through Central Park. It’s dark out, between 9PM and 10PM. But they’re just hanging. Not harming anyone, maybe loud and full of energy, but they’re young teenagers, it’s what they do. It’s what we’ve all done at that age.
After some ‘boys will be boys’ play in the park, the police arrive. 20+ young black and brown teenagers run to flee the scene. And to be honest, rightfully so. This is the 1980s in New York City, when anyone sees a police officer coming towards a group of minorities, they’re going to run. I would run too.
Most got away, but Kevin and Raymond did not.
Eventually, due to heavy intimidation and coercion, the other three boys, Antron, Yuseff and Korey are brought into the station as well.
The station is a shit-show to say the least. You have all of these white, uncultured, prejudice men and women, who represent the justice system may I add, interrogating five black and brown boys.
They are mean to them (an understatement). They belittle them. They assault them. They intimidate them into saying things that were not true. They put words in their mouths. They lie to them. They turn the boys against one another. They use their white privilege to make the boys feel as if they can trust them, but in true fashion, show their disingenuous colors.
And eventually they got three of the five boys to sign off on statements that were not true. These statements said that the boys were guilty and 100% committed these crimes.
Now if you haven’t seen this four episode docu-series yet, you may be asking yourself, “where were the parents?” Well, I’m not going to tell you. I want you to watch this series by black film director, producer, screenwriter, film marketer and film distributor, Ava DuVernay. I want you to watch this so you can feel it, so you can connect with it and really get something out of it. I want you to watch this so you can want to share it with someone and they watch it too.
So, I’m not telling you.
But one thing I will tell you is this. This is the reality of a lot of our black and brown men. They are disrespected on the regular. Seen as animals. Belittled for being black and brown. Gunned down for having a voice and incarcerated because they are pawns in an unjust system.
After watching the series and crying my way through, it got me thinking about the black man…
As soon as a black man open his eyes and puts his feet on the floor, he knows the day has started and that society is against him.
The system is against the black man.
The system puts our kings in jail, provide them little to no mental attention, let them out and set a trap.
The trap is premeditated. They let our black kings out of jail and tell them they can have probation. But probation includes being a perfect, law abiding citizen, usually for a ridiculous amount of time, and expecting no mess ups.
But these black men, these black kings, these black providers… are also human. And humans make mistakes. Humans will mess up from time to time. But the black man is not seen as a human, he’s seen as a “black man.”
It must be hard being a black man. Having to deal with your beautiful, historic and culture traits being used against you. There are bigger black men and there are smaller black men. There are darker black men and there are lighter black men. Some black men have more weight and stock and there are some black men who have smaller frames.
It must be hard being a black man. Because a black man, regardless of weight and size is still “just a black man” to the system and society. A black man can be seen as a threat. A black man, the same size as a white man, can be perceived as more intimidating or aggressive simply because he is black.
It must be hard being a black man. Having to seem strong and emotionally equipped all the time. Having to provide for your families, having to bite your tongue in fear of being shot and killed by the police, having to protect yourself from other men and women of all kinds of races who may want to harm you. Having to always be in survival mode.
And then, after all that, they are expected to have a heart. To be warm. To be approachable.
But with all that on their shoulders? With all that pressure, with all the prejudices, with all that weight?
I feel for my black kings. My black and brown brothers.
After watching When They See Us, I have a different outlook. I want to protect and uplift our black kings. I don’t care if one or two have played with my heart before. I don’t care if a black father wasn’t around, I don’t care if one has hit on me and made me feel a way. These things are minimal compared to the fight against our black kings.
The government, the people, society, is out to get them. They want our kings dead. They want to be able to kill them with no trace. They would prefer one less black man on this earth.
And they are working on it tirelessly…
Whether it’s by getting them in the prison system
Messing with their minds to the point where our kings are committing suicide
Keeping our areas underdeveloped so the only options to make money are by doing something illegal or “morally” wrong
Etc., etc.
Oh and I put morally in quotes because these are the same people who beat and provoke our black kings. The same people who draw their weapons before even letting us grab our IDs. These are the same people who will pin a case on five innocent young black kings, just because they happen to be in the same vicinity. And with no DNA, no semen, no witnesses, these same black kings had to serve between 6-15 years in prison.
So the idea of morals is a joke. But let me continue…
Prison: a place where the black man is still at the bottom of the barrel. He is confined. He is mistreated. He is provoked. He is expected not to defend himself and is expected to always keep his cool. But how can this be possible? No proper nutrition is being given, mental health is the last thing on the judicial system’s mind, and the black man is next in line to just being another number.
It breaks my heart.
I feel for our black men.
You know, before I watched When They See Us, I have to be honest, I had a habit of ignoring shows and movies like this. It would make me sad. I don’t like seeing our black kings beat up, provoked and intimidated by weak, cowardly cops. I don’t like seeing the horrible things done to them. I even found myself ignoring certain news updates. It was all happening so often and so fast, I found myself just staying away.
But it was meant for me to see When They See Us. It was meant for me to see this real story and feel for our black kings. I needed to take the blinders off and have a real moment. I needed to see that not only did these treatments start decades ago, they are still happening to this day.
So I want to protect our kings.
I want to pray for our kings.
I want to pray for my father. A black man who has always had the chips stacked up against him. I want to pray for my black ex-boyfriend. He is tall, he is darker skinned, he has a stare like no other. But these same traits that I find attractive, can be used against him when it comes to society. I want to pray for my black, Nigerian friend. He is like a brother to me. And although he may look intimidating and always serious, he has a heart and feelings too. He is a black man with a tall stature and serious demeanor but that does not mean he should be seen as a threat.
So I am going to start there. I am going to start with praying for our black kings. All of them. Praying that God continues to keep them safe. Praying that God keeps them out of harm’s way. Praying that this fight against them will soon stop. And the world will see the true value of a black man.
He is a not a punching bag, he is not a scapegoat. He is a person. A person with a heart, just like you and me. A person with a mind, just like you and me. A person with a family. A person with dreams, goals, and aspirations. A person who should be treated like a decent human being.
I don’t care what the media has to say about our black men, they are kings. And need to be treated as such. So I want to start lifting them up.
I have a habit of saying “men ain’t shit.”
Due to my past relationships, I felt justified in saying so. And although some have broke my heart, walked out when I needed them the most or stayed cold instead of warming up and being emotional, they are still our black kings. And they have enough to worry about. These things are minimal compared to what they have to face everyday.
Like I said in the beginning of this piece, as soon as a black man opens his eyes and puts his feet on the floor he knows that society is against him. So why not be one more person actually for them? Why not pray for them? Why not lift them up? Why not give them confidence boosters? Why not remind them that they are loved? Why not tell them that regardless of what society says or does, they matter.
As you’re reading this I want to encourage you to pray for the black man. Keep them on your mind and wish good things for them.
Because the reality is… it’s hard being a black man.
Love,
A Praying Black Woman