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So, as promised, I joined a dating app!
Hopefully you read It Goes Down in the DM (Part 1), but if not here’s a quick overview:
I was #TeamNoDatingApps until I realized sliding into someone’s DM on Instagram is super similar to a dating app. So I say said, “what the hay - let’s join one!”
And I did. On December 1, 2019, I, Jalyssa T. Woodall, joined a dating app.
Hinge, to be exact. Don’t try and look me up though, I told them my name was Lisa. Which technically it is, it’s just spelled differently. (Ooh sidenote, #FactAboutMe whenever I meet a guy I tell him my name is Lisa. So if it don’t work out, and they yell my name on the street, I can be like “who?” But if it does work out I can tell him it’s really Jalyssa aka Ja-Lisa. You get what I’m saying?”)
But anyway! Yes! I joined one. And if I’m being completely honest, my Hinge was poppin! But before we get into all that, I’m going to walk you through how to set up a profile:
So of course, you download Hinge from the app store, and sign up for an account. They give you a series of questions, and the answers go on your profile. Which I thought was kinda cute! But before you can do all that, it asks the infamous iPhone question…
Would you like to enable notifications?
The word notifications makes me squirm! I hate having notifications on. I feel like people can just insert themselves into my life, without my permission, and I don’t play that!
But in order for me to get the full experience, I decided to say yes and enable them.
Okay now to the cute little questions they were asking...
It started with “who do you want to date?” Select men, women, or everyone.
I chose men. I wish there was a way to chose men AND Young M.A. But it wasn’t, so men it is.
Next , they asked if you want kids.
I picked yes! Because of course I do, just not right now.
Then they asked where I worked - and of course, I left that blank (y’all ain’t finna come find me!)
They asked my religious views, and if I drank, smoke, or took pills.
They wild for the pill part but I guess that’s normal now days? Either way I picked no, no, and no. Granted I do drink coolers but I feel like them don’t count.
Then they asked me to pick some cute photos (6 to be exact) and they’d be featured on my profile. I picked some cute ones! Some were up close so you can see this melanin poppin and some were from far back so you can see these thighs rockin! (Yeah, I be rhyming).
Anyway, I thought that was it for the questions but they asked a few more:
What are your simple pleasures?
What’s your ideal date?
We’ll get along if…
Real TV-ish! Internally I was all “okayyyy y’all doing a lot” but I went with it.
My answers were pretty dry in my opinion. I said things like “we’ll get along if you have a life too” and “my simple pleasures are lighting candles and chilling on the couch after a long day of work.” (AKA what I’m doing right now).
Basically I wasn't saying nothing fancy. A part of me was still shocked I even joined this MF, but it was free and it’s just an experience so again, I went with it.
Next was the screen that everyone looks forward to… liking another’s person’s pic.
But me? Jalyssa T? Cannot relate. I was scared as hell to like somebody pic! I just felt like it was awkward. Cause I don’t know these people! And they don’t know me.
So I ain't like no pics the first few days… but that didn't stop people from liking and commenting on mine. All I gotta say is... the block was hot! And my inbox was POPPIN.
The first few days on the app I was more tuned in. Actually and actively responding to people’s messages. It was cool! And eventually, I liked a few pics too. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be. I was just myself and said things like “I like yo pic” and then a conversation would flow.
A few asked for my number but I wasn't interested in doing all that so soon, especially because we had barely talked in the app.
Like how you gon barely have good convo in the app but think you finna get my number? For what? When we can just talk in here? In conclusion, a few guys didn’t get my number for that exact reason. But this one, we’ll call him X, did.
X was cool for the most part. He works with computers and was handsome in his pic. He slid in my DM and said “good morning gorgeous how’s your week been?”
Told him how my week was going, in detail of course, and to my surprise, he responded with details about his week too. Shocking! Cause you know dudes nowadays be dry and can barely hold a conversation...
After days of DMing consistently, he eventually asked for my number and I gave it to him. He didn't seem like a creep (so far) and I kept forgetting to open the app to respond, so texting would be better anyway.
X and I texted a few more days and eventually he suggested we Facetime. I’m okay, cool…
Well turns out I got some sucky news at work and I didn’t really feel like talking. So when it was time to Facetime I keep it a hundred with X and suggested we reschedule...
Long story short, he was acting hella salty and we ain’t spoke since. The end.
A little dramatic right? I guess I could have hit him up the next day but I was in my feelings about work and he ain't make it no better so I was over it.
But, those technicalities don’t matter. What matters is, I said I was going to join a dating app and I did! I pushed through, I endured, I achieved a goal! And yes, I am proud of me *pats self on the back
Granted, I haven’t touched the app in weeks (other than when I get a new notification - cause yes, my profile is still poppin) but I’m proud of myself for even signing up in the first place. Ya girl did that!
And since we’re here ... I guess I’ll give y’all a little tea on this…
Okay so there’s this guy.
No, this MAN.
There’s this MAN.
And umm, we met.
Like, randomly after my work holiday party. I was in the lobby at the same time as him, he offers to take my pic by the tree, a couple randomly walks by, thinks we’re together and offers to take our picture. Cute right? And no I’m not making this up.
Well after we take the pic eventually we have a conversation, I tell him about the blog and wah-la! We’re here.
He’s cool so far. I’m not gon say too much because he actually reads my stories (which I like, cause y’all know the blog is my baby) but again, he’s cool!
We’re not dating, we’re not humping, we’re just... getting to know each other. He’s nice so far, don’t be tryna come all up in my house, and has taken me out a few times. Again, we’re just getting to know each other.
But okay, one last thing and I’m done. You wanna know what’s crazy??? We have the SAME BIRTHDAY. Yes, me and this man have the exact same birth day. March 29th! So maybe that’s why I think he’s cool? Cause most people with this birthday are *flips hair *
But okay, that’s my dating app journey! If you said you wanted to join and haven’t yet, let me leave you with this: ”so you’re sitting on your couch, you’re watching TV, and your life is passing you by…”
Naw but foreal. Do it! If I can do it, you can too! Plus it’s just an app. If you don’t like it anymore just delete it. Then maybe you’ll meet someone at Aldi or a holiday party, like me. Either way, dating apps are decent. I can see why people are into it and I can see how some are not. I couldn’t really get jiggy with it but I wish you the best of luck!
Til next time,